I'm really, really not in the mood to write a blog today, but I feel as though I more or less owe it to myself. I'm unsure as to why. I've felt 'off' all day today. I couldn't place the reason until I entered my room back here at Uni.
I felt restless. As though I'd come from somewhere foreign and had been expected to stay somewhere that wasn't home. It didn't feel right at all. I've lost the feeling of belonging I've had for the past four years, and I don't like it one bit. Needless to say it hasn't been the best of days. Sometimes things just seem so utterly...pointless, really. I'm just selfishly glad for the few tender thoughts that seem to be carrying me through just recently. I guess that's the only time I'm allowed to be soft. When I'm alone with my own thoughts. I'm the Ice Bitch, afterall. Even my friends shove me into boxes of their making.
I've been trying to figure out what I want from life, from the future that's creeping up on me with every hour that seems to pass me by so lazily. I've an idea...and there's one or two consistent things within each of the futures I paint myself, and personally, I find that a little worrying.
It's my last University Seminar tomorrow, and it's only about revision. Then I have two weeks to prepare for my English Exam. Fun.
